


If Wishes Were Horses Vignette

by MorganaNK



Category: Inspector Lynley - All Media Types, Inspector Lynley Mysteries (TV)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-27 14:02:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15026207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganaNK/pseuds/MorganaNK
Summary: A little internal musing from the main players in this episodeHelen is normal font, Barbara is italics, Tommy is bold.





	If Wishes Were Horses Vignette

**Author's Note:**

> Property of Elizabeth George and the BBC, no copyright infringement intended

I saw Barbara’s face when Tommy told her that I was going to speak to Noel Shakespeare. I couldn’t help but feel smug that he chose me. It’s about time he started putting me first.

_It was a shock, the feeling that washed over me when Tommy decided to take Helen with him to interview Noel Shakespeare. I was jealous, and then I felt ridiculous because I felt jealous, but the jealousy was still there. I am his partner, damn it!_

**I don’t understand why Barbara isn’t happy with Helen coming along with me to interview Noel Shakespeare. It makes sense, she is a criminal profiler, her insight will be invaluable.**

Tommy being attentive to me, putting me first, this is how things should be. I even feel secure enough to invite Barbara to share supper with us, and okay, maybe I want to gloat a little.

_A hot bath! A bloody hot bath! I should have known that Helen wouldn’t have accepted that as a valid excuse, and now I am stuck having supper with her and Tommy. Ugh!_

**Barbara doesn’t want to be here. Oh, she’s putting on a good show, but I’ve worked with her long enough to know that she is faking it. Helen seems happy though, so that’s good.**

He was with her when I was unconscious in hospital. I guess that tells me everything I need to know.

_I wish Tommy would step away from this investigation, although I can understand why he won’t. He’s driving himself crazy with his vengeance kick, and he’s driving me crazy right along with him._

**I’m consumed with guilt. Guilt that I wasn’t enthusiastic about the baby when Helen first told me. Guilt that I didn’t do more to support her. Guilt upon guilt upon more guilt.**

I can’t stay. When it came down to it Tommy wasn’t there for me. He was with her. He says he was doing it for me, for us, but I’m not convinced. I need time away, time to think. Time to grieve for everything I've lost.

_He’s going to need my support now Helen has left him. He won’t welcome it, but I’m going to give it to him anyway._

**“Havers? Barbara… Barbara…”**


End file.
